goodnight, cow.

we r finally released from hell @ local time 22.54. tomorrow we'll wait for shit happens, hopefully d cow wil be more determined bout wat she wants. then mayb we'll be released earlier say... 22.30?

my 3rd sketch, including the cow.

my work station

stupid cow

stupid cow. she probably got the mad cow disease tht cause her brain not functioning well. who could possibly get d brief WRONG for SO MANY TIMES in a month n causing us to do so much nonsense til wee hours in the day? classic.

(this is even too cute for her)

purity in a piece of 'mess'

i like to look at children's drawing cos most of them don really make sense, but fun. they r the real talents, unpolished but real. a trained n famous artist can never draw as good as a child does, no matter how hard he imitates, he'll never get the feelings under those childish strokes right.

i cant help but smile when i see kids paint pics in rediculous colors. if u ask why his sun is in blue he may answer: cos tht's only color i left on my palatte. or some other interesting explanations out of ur expectation.

i know some parents n teachers blame children for inconsistent coloring strokes, judging art pieces according to correctness in terms of: one flower should never be in multi colors; table should not hav five legs; winnie the pooh doesnt look like winnie the pooh at all... u see, tht's wat we adults losing when we grows, we lost the third eye tht can see special things.

if everything has to be drawn in the way it is, sky is blue, flower is red, car has four wheels... y not jus take a pic of it? jus a snap u'll get things right n fast, but they might not look beautiful.

mental vacation

ever since i started working, i notice when am stress or bored or feeling blank i'll go get myself some drinks. having something to drink at moments like tht is like rejuvenating my thoughts, n my spirit. even though it doesn't help all the time but i call it mental vacation, tht takes my mind to a better place when i need an escape.

lately i discover another way to go for mental vacation - plan for ur holiday. whether u can make the journey or not eventually, the whole process of doin research on places u wish to visit; checking n comparing rates between travel agencies; downloading beautiful pics n info of ur desired destinations... oredi give u a total vacation mood.

so, find yourself a way for mental vacation today!

'kiasu'

everyone knows how great the feeling is to sleep in rainy days. if it's raining in the afternoon, i'll force myself to take a nap. if it's raining in the late evening, i'll jump into the bed n try to sleep early. if it's raining in the midnight, i'll tell myself to seize the moment n sleep 'harder'. tht's jus soooooo kiasu of me i know.

heaven & earth, fire & water.

most of the dog person don't like cat. they think cat is snobbish, rebel & no loyalty at all.

but they r wrong. first of all, there's nothing to compare between cats n dogs becos they r totally two different species. it's like u can't complain the asam laksa doesn't taste like the tomato sauce in pasta. u jus gotta accept a cat, as a cat. they don wag tails like dogs do; they won't jump all over u when u reach home; they definately won't fetch u slippers but they purr when u pat them; they meow when u r home n they love u jus as much as dogs do, but in different ways.

so, if u can't accept cats in their natural manners, u don hav to like them, but don't deny them as a great pet.

my 1st sketch after many donkey years

say it, say u love me.

wat's in the sky today?

evening. i saw this boy from the neighbourhood snapping pics of the sky, i was driving out, wondering wat's in the sky tht draws so much of his attention. i looked out from the window, i saw 2 sets of rainbow crossing each other, forming this phenominal piece of art in the sky tht looked amazingly breathtaking...

when was the last time u look up to the sky and admiring the nature beauty? i believe when we were small, many of us liked to look at the clouds n told wat shapes they were in, sometimes it forms a tea-pot, an old man, a bird...etc; we looked into the sky trying to find the star signs we read from science text book; we often saw the 'cellulite marks' left by the jets; we stared at the dark sky wondering where's the end n wat's beyond tht... i donno haw many of you stil do but i dont anymore.

now i look up to the sky n i'll said: "damn hot, better drive out for lunch today." or, "shit, it's gonna rain, better leave before the jam starts."

i think this is really sad, when we grow big, our vision turns small.

chatuchak pet stores

now i know how to upload video to my blog... this was taken in bangkok chatuchak pet stores, sooooo many of them, sooooooo cute, but i feel pity to see this cos i always encourage adoption rather than breed for business. anyway, before i go further on this 'heavy' issue, let's hav some 'light' moments, enjoy the video.

N.K.O.T.B

gee, in the middle of the night, in the middle of my work, suddenly i thought of this new kids on the block group. man... those were the days, omos 20yrs ago i was all over them, not to mention all their albums, video cassettes (no vcd yet ok?), i spent sooo much on those 'just seventeen', 'smash hits'..etc, even jus a single 3x5cm pic of jordan knight wil provoke my desire of owning the magazines. n i remember i wrote a slogan in one of their single release contest n i won a t-shirt, with their faces printed on it, was so happy omos wanted to cry...

lol! lol! lol!

another late night

this is my dinner tonight, it's on the company. i don care if i can finish, i ordered half chicken plus 2 side dishes (of cos i can finish...)

new tricks

been learning some new tricks from other ppl's blogs, like: adding chatbox; adding photo albums; adding site meter...etc. ya i know, these hav been existing for LONG time but they r NEW to me ok? i always think am an idiot to all electrical appliances including all things computerised, must thank those genius who wrote the scripts n giv it to ppl like me FREE. kudos!

when love is not enough

i remember when we were small, my sister bout 11-12yrs old, i was bout 8-9yrs old, oneday we reached home after school, the 1st thing our brother told us was: "ma left home." my sister n i was panic, we grabbed some coins n headed straight to the bus station in front of our house. we wanted to search for ma but donno how, to us, at age like tht, we thought since ma left home, she must hav gone very far, n we believed goin up to a bus would take us far enough to find her. i remember bus fare was 50cent for each person regardless where your destination is, at last we got down the bus at where we got up, but no ma with us. we cried while walking back home, then we saw ma in the kitchen preparing dishes for dinner. i forgot wat happened next, did we ask her y she left home? did we hug n cried all over her? i don seem to remember but we had ma back.

many many yrs later when we all grow up, once we accidentally brought up the incident n tht was the 1st time we heard ma talked bout it. she had a terrible fight with pa tht day n she vowed she would walk out of the house n never comes back. we asked where did she go. ma said she contacted a friend who would help her out finding a job in canada, she got up to the bus to reach her. during the journey, ma was hesitated n same as us, she got down the bus at where she got up. we must thank the bus routine was damn far n long so tht she had enough time to justify her decision, oso becos she knows, there's still love in the family. she knows if she went, she wil not see her 5 children anymore. she knows if she went, the marriage wil be broken into pieces.

i guess tht must be one of the tests in my ma n pa's 40+yrs of marriage. many couples made it becos there's something worth saving for. could be the children, could be the old good time spent together, or simply becos there's stil love for each other. but when love ain't enough, there's just nothing left.

owl

i think i must be an owl in my previous life, i can't sleep at night. am tired n sleepy in the daytime but at night i jus stare at the ceiling while clock ticking. when i stay back for work in the office, am generally tired but when it's past 12 midnight, am refreshed n can stay up to 5, 6 in the morning! this is not funny, i need sleep. help.

...

this is to jc wong

i forgot which day, one of these busy days, was on the way home around 1am, tuned into this chinese radio station, the dj was reading some emails/articles/sms... from the listeners. mayb at hours like tht, they were all sentimental. thought of switching channel until the dj read d article from jc wong, i cant recall the content in every detail but watever she wrote, match every single thoughts in my mind. the journey home tht night was not alone, i finally feel i was understood n someone outhere is thinking so close as i am. jc wong, whoever u r, thank you very much.

let go

not a smooth shooting day

too many cooks spoil the soup. absolutely agree with this more than anything. since i cant trash my foul language to the client, i murdered the burger.

when my day comes

i know now is stil chinese new year, but let's talk about death. i think it's a healthy topic n we shud not feel offended even the festive mood is stil in the air.

i'm always not afraid to talk bout death, not only becos i don plan to live long, but i believe the more we talk about it, the more well-prepared we r when the day comes. for instance insurance comes handy when an accidental death happens, unless u r damn rich otherwise please consider buying one cos u wont want ur family clearing ur shitty funeral bills after u r dead. do up a will when u r free, decide ur beneficiary(ries) under ur insurance policy(cies), epf...etc, pls write ur bank accounts info n pin numbers n save it somewhere tht ur family or close friends wil find so tht they know how to withdraw the balance...etc. things like these wil ease up the 'death' situation a lot.

i always thought of dying at the age of 50something, then a friend reminds me about my epf savings can only be withdrawed at age 55, i forgot who u r but i thank u very much cos i totally forgot bout it. so i extended my limit to 60something, not so much difference i think, mayb few more lines on the face.

i wil definately donate watever i hav or i can, hope they r all well-maintained n still usable. burn my remainings for space saving n easy visits, we chinese hav many festivals tht require visits to the dead for paying respects, or 4-digits. i don mind to use my ashes as fertiliser as well, it's really environmental friendly.

i certainly wil be more than happy to know which country(ies) legalise 'putting myself to sleep', any friends reading this n know d answer pls be generous, don keep the good thing to yourself, tell me. i probably need to save up some money for tht. nothing is more humane n respectful than ending my life like this if i were to suffer in serious illneses when am old, n it helps to ease pain of my loved ones too.

keep my grand day simple n nice, nice as in having nice foods for all my friends who come to see me. playing my favourite songs looped in cd is good enuf, don ever hire those bands, from d funerals i attended, i hardly find one good band for occasion like this. n pls don black-mouthed me on this day, no matter wat i did wrong, how bad i treated u, how bitchy i was, am sorry but don do tht, it's for ur own karma.

the last but not least, if i die before all my pets, whoever willing to adopt them n treat them as their own child, i will bless u well, no matter am in heaven or hell.

thank u very much.

the reunion

i spent most of my chinese new year holiday at my ma's house. not only for the free food, it's becos my eldest sister is back from the states, to see my father.

we haven't met for 10 yrs. 1st day meeting her at the hospital we hav nothing much to talk about. luckily we share one father so he became our topic of tht day. later during chinese new year, i spent more time with her shopping, eating, cooking, chatting n driving her around town, gap still there but better. 10yrs apart, n 10yrs age difference, we cant expect anything more than tht. my relief, she doesn't talk to me as her little sister anymore. we talk like friends do, chatting bout her life there, gossip bout the relatives n laugh bout it.

we all hav grown, i've grown up, well, she's grown old (wicked me i know...) she is goin back to the states soon, guess she wil b back with my brother-in-law in the month of oct or so, til then we'll be apart again, when wil i see u again?